Talent?
by the-real-jared-kleinman
Summary: Virgil's not usually one to want to be placed in the spotlight, but Anxiety, his alter ego, certainly is! When he hears about a talent competition at his arts school, his friends Patton and Logan convince him to try out. And, lo and behold, he makes it through auditions and will be part of the competition! Now he just hast to make it through... ten... more... rounds... OH SHI-


'Oh, great. Sunny.' he thought, covering his eyes and peering up into the sky. He opened his umbrella, the white color showing brightly against the vivid colors of the art department.

Stepping out into the sunlight, he began to make his way through campus, following the multicolored stripes painted on the sidewalk that led to the theater wing. Along the way he passed a few of his friends, who walked and chatted for a minute or two before parting ways.

Once he got to his destination, he flung the doors open with a flourish, letting them bang against the wall before announcing a dramatic "Let the auditions begin!"

Everyone snapped to attention after his grand entrance, but one person in particular seemed absolutely terrified by the sudden noise. He studied the panicked boy intensely, noting the under-eye eyeshadow and all-black attire. Mentally naming the boy 'Panic! At the Everywhere', he returned to the task at hand.

"Welcome to the talent show auditions, my name is Roman Prince. You've all gotten your randomly assigned numbers from Joan, correct?" There were nods and mumbles of agreement from nearly everyone in the room. "Good. So, this is how the auditions are going to work. Each of you, when your number is called, will go onstage, call out a stage name, and then perform whatever you believe can land you a spot. Remember, there are only thirty spots, and like a hundred of you, so you can't be upset if you don't get picked. Ready? Number Thirty Two, you're up! 96, you're cued up next!"

I can't do this I can't do this why did I let Patton sign me up for this?!?!?!?! Ok, I'm number 66, so I should have awhile before I perform. Ok, calm down, you should be going right in the middle, no pressure.

Holy shit what the fuck was that boom it gave me a heart attack no wait I'm okay why the fuck did that guy just slam the doors open like that why does he have an umbrella why is he staring at me why did he shout I need to calm down a little deep breaths like Logan taught me in for four hold for seven out for eight and repeat. good. Now, he said his name was Roman, goodie he seems like a jock kid greeaat... Oh shit a stage name Anxiety probably I use it already so that should work. I need to change and get into character though.

Ooh text Patton and ask him if he could grab my patchwork hoodie and my makeup kit. In, hold, out. Ooh, that girl is really good she's got a great singing voice she called herself Ariel which is actually really fitting for the song and her voice.

Patton says that he's bringing the stuff so I just gotta wait Hmm where is Ariel familiar from??????? Oh, right her name's Valerie wow she got taller and her voice got SO much better since elementary school.

Patton's outside and 96 just got onstage and 73 was called for cue Alright grab stuff from patton now gonna ask him to wait in the theater and come get me when I was called up for cue he said yes now to the nearest bathroom.

-Skip cuz I know nothing about makeup-

He stared at himself in the mirror, barely recognizing himself under the makeup. He had 'ANX' written on his left cheek, lots of layered eyeshadow over and under his eyes, black fading to a purplish-red. His cheekbones were exaggerated slightly, and his lips were the same shade of purple as his eyeshadow.

He had just finished fixing his hair when Patton opened the door to the bathroom.

"Hey, um, I'm looking for a kid with a patchwork purple and black hoodie, eyeshadow smeared under his eyes, about the same height as me with purple hair? You seen anyone like that?" Patton asked, not recognizing his friend.

"Pat, right here." he said, slipping the hoodie over his long-sleeved black shirt.

"Oh, well hi! You sure fooled me, kiddo! You were called for cue."

"Thanks, Pat. Be out in a second."

He packed up his make up kit, and grabbed his other hoodie before hiding his face beneath his hood and making his way through the people gathered for the auditions. He dropped his stuff by Patton, and then patiently waited for act 19 (Talyn, another friend of his) to finish backstage.

"Number Sixty six, you're up! Number 99, you're up for cue!"

He took a deep breath, walked onstage, and immediately called out, "Name's Anxiety, and I'll be playing the guitar."

He pulled his hood away from his face and looked out to the audience, hearing a couple gasps at the makeup, and began to play the first few notes.

It took him a second to work up the courage, but after a quick thumbs up from Patton he was ready to go.

"Oh, well imagine, as I'm pacing the pews in a church corridor, I can't help but to hear, oh, I can't help but to hear an exchanging of words."

He took a breath, and his voice steadied. "'What a beautiful wedding! What a beautiful wedding!' says a bridesmaid to a waiter. 'Oh, yes, but what a shame, what a shame the poor groom's bride is a whore.'" He readjusted his grip on the pick, shaking out his other hand in anticipation. "I chime in with a 'Haven't you people ever heard of closing a goddamn door, no.' It's much better to face these kinds of things with a sense of poise and rationality. I chime in, 'Haven't you people ever heard of closing a goddamn door, no.' It's much better to face these kinds of things with a sense of-." Flashing his most charming smile, he continued, "Oh, well, in fact, well I'll look at it this way. I mean, technically, our marriage is saved! Well this calls for a toast, so pour the champagne! Oh, well in fact, well I'll look at it this way! I mean, technically, our marriage is saved! Well this calls for a toast, so pour the champagne, pour the champagne!"

"'I chime in with a 'Haven't you ever heard of closing a goddamn door?' No, it's much better to face these kinds of things with a sense of poise and rationality. I chime in 'Haven't you people ever heard of closing a goddamn door?' No, it's much better to face these kinds of things with a sense of poise and rationality."

He continued, not making a single mistake, (but he'd find one later).

As he played the last chord, and his hands stilled, he looked out on a cheering crowd, the clapping and whistles almost too loud.

"Alright, alright. Settle down! Number Ninety-Nine, onstage please. 17, you're up next!"

Anxiety made his way offstage, going straight to Patton.

"Wowza, kiddo! You totally destroyed the competition!" Patton said, handing him back his regular black hoodie and makeup kit.

"Thanks, Patton. I'll be right back, gotta wash off my makeup real quick." he replied, already leaving.

-Time skip (again, clueless about makeup)-

He glanced in the mirror one last time, satisfied the eyeshadow covered his bags, and then packed everything up. Exiting the one-person unisex bathroom, he made his way back to the gym.

He was greeted with a peppy "Hey, kiddo!" from Patton as he slid into the seat next to him, for once grateful for his friend's ever present duffel-bag so he had a place to store the makeup and hoodie.

The two chatted aimlessly for a little, commenting on their favorite or least favorite acts.

"Alright, we have the results! If your name's called, please come onstage. If not, you need to exit through the yellow door with Joan. Alright? Good. 17, 32, 97, 92, 53, 99, 12, 7, 72, 48, 45, 83, 37..." he tuned out the list, slightly disappointed that neither him nor Valerie or Talyn got called onstage.

"Alright, the remaining thirty or so of you still sitting, please follow Joan out the yellow door to your right. Thank you, bye~"

They all stood and left with Joan, minus Patton and a couple other friends who were just there for moral support. "Alrighty, guys. I just wanna thank you for coming, and I just have one last announcement to make before you go. Congratulations on making it into round Two of the talent competition, you thirty-two talented people!"


End file.
